


No One's Ever Really Gone

by mottsforthots



Series: Reylo Fics [3]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Ending, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Future, Bendemption, Canon Universe, Canonical Character Death, Character Death Fix, Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, F/M, Falling In Love, First Kiss, Idiots in Love, Kissing, Kylo Ren Redemption, Love, Love Confessions, Loving Marriage, Marriage, Not Really Character Death, Post-Canon, Pregnancy, Redemption, Resurrection, Spoilers, Temporary Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-20
Updated: 2019-12-20
Packaged: 2021-02-25 05:15:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21870658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mottsforthots/pseuds/mottsforthots
Summary: WARNING: TROS SPOILERS. DO NOT READ UNLESS YOU HAVE SEEN THE RISE OF SKYWALKER.*****In which Ben uses his life force to bring Rey back from the dead by sacrificing his own life, but Rey manages to bring him back as well and start a new life together.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey & Ben Solo, Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Series: Reylo Fics [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1485977
Comments: 24
Kudos: 393





	No One's Ever Really Gone

**Author's Note:**

> watched tros earlier today and decided to whip this up. it's probably terrible because i saw it hours ago and some details are already starting to get hazy, but i tried my best in my mentally unhealthy state xx

Ben gripped the edge of the rock with all the strength he could muster and pulled himself out of the crevasse, every bone in his body aching from the fall. His lungs wheezed fire and his nerves rang with pain, but still he dragged himself to flat land and took in his surroundings. The stadium was silent and very much destroyed. Where the throne Rey was supposed to sit on rested was now crushed under the weight of a giant boulder. And just in front of it, the limp body of his scavenger. 

Swallowing thickly, Ben began to hobble forward with what strength he had left. His back hurt and _damn…_ his leg hurt even more. Palpatine had flung him so easily into the angular pit, one half of his body searing with pain while the other was capable of getting him to the lifeless figure of the strong Jedi he adored so much. 

He’d been a fool and he knew it.

He thought he knew it the moment he first saw her in the forest when he chased after her so many moons ago, that terrified expression on her face as she’d poorly fired at him with her blaster while he followed expertly. 

Rey had given him so many chances to find the light again, to join her, to become Ben Solo once more, but he was a fool and denied it under the idea he would finally please Snoke and be great like his grandfather. That was never really going to happen, though, was it? Ben was never going to be like Darth Vader because Ben knew he wasn’t capable of it. He’d made horrible decisions along the way- murderous decisions that had ended millions of lives and traumatized countless others- but he remained conflicted throughout.

Only his beautiful desert treasure could remind him of that fact. And now he was paying for it as he tried to fight his way towards her slumped over body that rested on its side before the crushed throne. The side of his figure that sang with agony gave out halfway there and Ben groaned, tumbling forward as he clutched his ribs and looked up to the woman who still failed to stir. _Get up, Ben. Get up._ He drew from the force quickly, what little he could, to help himself back on his feet so he could continue on his path to her. 

The stadium was quiet now that Palpatine and his followers were dead beneath the rubble, but the thump of his heart in his chest seemed to ring in his ears louder than anything else. Closer and closer, he lumbered to the woman he loved and collapsed beside her body to look over her. There was blood on her head and her arms, but the pale side of her face and blue lips were what drew him in the most. Without another thought, Ben leaned over her lifeless figure and tugged her up into his arms, not caring at the moment that he was being less than gentle with her. 

The next time he swallowed, his throat was dry as he flimsily positioned her in his arms so he could look upon her face. What greeted him were eyes already distant with death and skin so white, it looked like the blood had already been drained of her body. Her arms hung heavily by her sides and her gaze was forever set on something he would never be able to see. 

The heart that once pounded in his chest had now gone still at the sight of her and the only thing he could manage to think was _I couldn’t save her._

With a sharp puncture through his chest at the realization she was dead in his arms, overexerted from killing Palpatine and bringing down the Final Order, Ben heaved her into his chest so her cold face could rest in the crook of his neck. He held her tightly against him, not allowing himself to cry just yet because for just one moment… he wanted to believe that she was still alive and holding him back. But her body was slack in his arms and heavy without any internal balance. 

_Internal balance._

A thought tore through his mind so fast, it felt like Snoke was prying into his mind for one final time like he’d done so often when Ben was younger. The memory of their fight on the water planet, the lightsaber through his flesh, the shock that both of them held on their face, the small hand over his wound that slowly closed as her life force transferred to him… Ben didn’t need to know any more. 

He took in a steadying breath, knowing what he had to do, then carefully let her drop from the hold around his torso while still supporting her head. His hand shook as he placed it over her stomach, all thoughts of death leaving his mind as he focused on transferring as much of his life force into her. Ben’s lungs ached when he drew in a deep, steady breath, but he continued the exercise again and again until his hand tingled with warmth and he began to push it into her own body. 

The powers of the force had prepared him for many things, but this was not something he ever thought he’d have to do. Glimmering memories of Rey danced in his head; him observing her sleeping frame in his arms when he carried her away to be interrogated, their fight on Starkiller Base when he admired her face under the purple glow as she tapped into the force- _really_ tapped into it- for the first time, how angry she’d been when their minds first connected and she’d shot her blaster at him, when she found comfort in him after her journey to the dark on Ahch-To and the touch of their hands, her constant defiance and lust for battle as their minds found each other again and again in her search for the path to Exegol.

And then just moments ago- their eyes connecting when she finally took in Ben Solo and gave him the lightsaber to fight the Knights of Ren he had once ruled over. 

All of the recollections steadied him as he gave whatever life force he could to her, and in this case… _all of it._ Ben knew what he had to do, but it was worth it. It was worth it to know she’d smile again, breathe again, fight again, _live_ again. He needed her to live because she was the one who had caused _him_ to live again, as the man he was meant to. 

The hand on his own pulled him from the lulling surge of energy passing from him to her and while he could feel his heart grow slower in his chest, nothing made him feel as far away from death as the hazel eyes that peered up at him in disbelief. “Ben?” His name spilled softly from her lips and sent a welcomed ache to his heart as he nodded and held back the wave of tears that threatened to pour down his cheeks. The smile that consumed Rey’s face was dazzling in every sense of the word and when that delicate hand that had covered his seconds ago now cupped the side of his face, Ben swore his heart only began to beat faster. 

She was happy to see him. _Him_. The smile that he returned could only convey what he hoped was absolute relief and admiration, the acknowledgment that he had pulled her from death filling his veins with the warmest sensation he’d ever felt. Rey loved his smile. His teeth were crooked but perfect in their own way, and she figured she always knew that. Every part of Ben was flawless from his messy hair to his dirty cheeks to the dimples that crinkled up his face in the most stunning way possible. 

It was hard to ignore that Ben was handsome, and even harder to ignore that somehow, deep down, Rey knew she’d always had feelings for the man. She by no means loved the actions he carried out or decisions he went along with, but she’d sensed the conflict in him and draw to the light all along and that- _that_ was what pushed her to finally kiss him. It was a passionate thing, all emotions spilling out of her into one single act of love as her lips met his soft and consuming ones.

The hand around her back clutched her tightly to pull her closer, Ben’s own feelings of devotion and care fueling the kiss in ways words simply couldn’t do right now. They’d always been passionate like this, though, hadn’t they? Always quick to fight each other, now quick to revere one another. His mouth was warm and comforting on hers and her lips were safe and welcoming on his. All too quickly, she pulled away to admire him once more, and his heart began to slow yet again. Ben could feel it coming faster for him now. 

He’d had his moment with her, finally, and now it was time for him to go. 

Part of him panicked as he began to slip from her hold, her own eyes widening a bit as her eyebrows furrowed in that way they always did when she wasn’t sure about something, but the other half of him felt… peaceful. Ben had served his purpose, hadn’t he? He’d helped Rey as best as he could to defeat Palpatine, he brought her back from death, and he’d showed her just how much he cared all this time. Yes, it was time for him to go. He’d done what he needed to do. 

The rock was cold against his skin when he finally made contact with it, her hand clutching his own as she realized what was happening. The stupid smile from their kiss still filled his face when he closed his eyes and then…

Rey’s hands were flat on his body. Lifeless, dull, and suddenly cold, Rey felt like a knife had just been stabbed into her heart again and again before finally settling in and twisting deep. The bond she shared with him in their minds snapped painfully and a choked sob of, “ _Ben_ ,” wrenched through her throat before she began to grab at his face and cup his cheeks like she’d done before their kiss. 

His body was fading though, growing more and more dim until her palms caressed solid rock and the loose black clothing he’d worn fluttered flat below her. “No,” she whispered painfully, “no, no, _no_ . Bring him back!” Rey cried desperately, her gaze turning to that of the open ceiling which now gazed upon an empty sky filled with the falling ships of the destroyed Final Order fleet. " _Bring him back to me!_ ” she wailed, falling on top of the pile of clothes as hot tears made steady paths down her cheeks.

_She’d just got him back. She’d just got him back._

Her dirty fingers clutched the tattered fabric that still smelled like him and she heaved into where his chest would be, horrible sobs filling the now empty stadium as she tried her best to channel the Jedi that had stood with her and filled her with strength not long ago. “Please…” she wept, “ _please_ , Ben. Come back to me. I need you. I love you… please, bring him back…” 

It seemed like she bawled for hours on his clothes, the symphony of _please_ and _Ben_ and _bring him back_ falling from her lips a million times over. She didn’t want him to be a force ghost, she wanted him to be alive. She wanted to hold his face, grasp his hand like she’d done in his final moments, kiss him a million times, just… _be_ with him. She wanted him more than she wanted anything in her life. 

The desire to find her parents had not been as great as this, she thought. 

A soft blue hue was ultimately what pulled her from his clothes, now wet with her tears and anguish. Rey sniffed, looking up in confusion only to see hundreds of gleaming blue figures peering upon her. She blinked a few times, anger flying through her as she lashed, “Come to take him from me?” Their eyes were nothing but understanding, though, and Rey took a moment to observe each person who stood before her. A small Master with large ears and a cane, an older Master with a fond smile and neatly trimmed facial hair, a younger man with a scar much like Ben’s and a mischievous smile, a taller and bald man who gazed upon her with curious reflection, and finally Luke and Leia who she recognized immediately. 

But no Ben. 

“Is he not one of you then? Was he not worthy?” Rey whispered, settled now as she genuinely inquired as to why they were before her. “No,” Luke finally stated, all of them remaining in their places. She couldn’t help the way her bottom lip trembled as more hot tears began to stain her dirty cheeks, her heart only shattering for the millionth time as she let her forehead sink back into the pool of fabric she’d created- the last of Ben. “He was more than worthy.”

The words uttered by Leia drew her gaze back up, now confused more than anything as the small Master no taller than her knee hobbled forward. “Yes, yes, appalling decisions _Kylo Ren_ made under the First Order, but heroic acts _Ben Solo_ did to ensure your survival,” the funny sounding Jedi explained. “Love him, do you?” He questioned with a fond gaze. 

All Rey could do was nod as she clutched the fabric yet again. 

“You’d take care of him? Guide him? Care for him, then, if he were still alive?” the older man asked then, his accent much like hers. Again, Rey nodded as her puzzlement only grew. “Would you help him pursue the light, wholly and justly?” The tall, bald Master’s deep timber voice startled her when he joined next, but Rey pursed her lips definitely and spoke firmly, “Yes. I would.” 

Leia and Luke spoke after the serious Master, grabbing her attention as they smiled upon her. “Would you help others see the good in him?” Leia pressed in that motherly tone Rey always appreciated. “Would you help him see the good in others?” Luke added. At that, Rey gathered up Ben’s clothes and stood on shaky legs, her eyes determined now and tears burning with a different passion as she stated raw and true, “I would.” 

The ghosts of Jedi before her all shared a long look until the man with the scar Rey had spotted earlier finally stepped forward and murmured, “Would you help him down a path I was unable to follow?” His eyes were kind and the small smile he offered her pushed Rey to use what last of her voice she could as she whispered, “It would be my most absolute duty.” 

And just like that, the blue hues of Jedi past vanished into thin air, leaving Rey alone yet again with her arms still clutching… 

She quickly looked down at her now empty arms, Ben’s clothing nowhere to be found. A surge of panic bubbled up from her throat as she turned around, frantic to find what left she had of him only to stagger back and fall when the large frame of Ben stood less than a foot away from her. Rey gasped for air as she scrambled backwards, his fond eyes only following her as a slight smile tugged at his lips. “You were so happy to see me not so long ago,” he teased in that deep voice that had Rey weak in the knees.

The cry of pure and utter euphoria that fell from Rey’s lips had her springing up from the floor and racing into his arms. They were firm and steady around her when he caught her, though he took a few awkward steps backward with a light chuckle to catch his balance. His face buried into the side of her neck as tears slipped down her cheeks and joyous sobs became muffled into his shirt. Ben clutched her tightly, the empty darkness he had just taken residence in suddenly forcing him back out and back to the scene of her staring at nothing in particular while she wept. 

“Miss me?” he whispered into the small space they shared. “I love you,” she declared breathily, afraid she was never going to be able to say it again- like this was some cruel trick and she was only allowed ten seconds with him before he was gone again. Ben pulled away with a toothy smile at her words, the tears he’d been holding back now freely falling down his own battle stained cheeks. “I know,” he murmured back to her, his warm palms rising to hold the sides of her face firmly before he bent down and pulled her into the second kiss they’d ever shared. 

Warm, fervent, and filled with love, their lips remained pressed together for what seemed like ages as they took one another in. Rey tasted sweet like horned melon and Ben smelled heavenly like mahogany teakwood, their own senses overwhelmed with a perfect balance. This time, when Rey pulled away to rest her forehead against his, he didn’t disappear from her grasp.

“I wish I told you how much I loved you ages ago. Your beautiful hazel eyes, freckles, and pink lips. So strong and brave and fierce. I _adore_ you, Rey,” Ben hummed into the little space they shared between their lips. “I knew you would come back to me, Ben. I just had to wait until you were that man again… but I always loved you.” Their hearts swelled at each other’s words and when Rey lifted her soft little hand to run from his eyebrow, over the curve of his nose, and down his cheek, Ben realized he no longer even held the scar of his past self. 

**Three Standard Years Later**

“You’re getting good with that. See if you can add one more to the ring,” Rey instructed carefully as she watched one of their many students levitate in the air, four rings of rocks swirling perfectly around him. His eyebrows furrowed in concentration, but a smaller rock from the pile set up below evenly began to move through the air and slip into a gap where it could float untouched. “Amazing, Eliami. I’ll have to let Ben know you’re advancing faster than we anticipated later today.” 

The younger boy smiled a little in his meditation, but carefully brought himself back to the ground moments later along with the rocks when Rey deemed their training done for the day. He raced off down the green cliff of Ahch-To to go and find friends to play with in the village while Rey smiled to herself and turned her gaze to the other side of the island where Ben was teaching a handful of students fighting techniques. 

Deciding to make a surprise appearance, Rey carefully made her way down the slope, thanks to the flat rocks, and slowly approached the training group with a fond smile. Ben caught her eyes only moments later, sensing her arrival, and gave her one of the toothy grins she’d grown to love so much. He gave a few more run throughs of the motions they’d learned today, Rey sitting down on a nearby rock to observe as the children of different ages practiced defense positions with large sticks.

They dismissed after two more run throughs, the children waving and greeting Rey as they raced past to get to the village like her own pupil had earlier. Ben just collected the sticks they’d abandoned on the flat ground and sighed humorously. “They do this every time to me, you know,” he chided as he picked up the last stick and slipped it into the bundle within his arm. “And you pick them up every time,” Rey countered with a teasing grin. “I’d help you, but you’d refuse anyway.”

Ben just gave her a pointed look filled with love before he set the stack down to the side. “With your condition? I doubt you can even bend over, my little Jedi,” he quipped. Rey just huffed and rose to her feet, albeit staggering a bit as her stomach still managed to catch her off balance a few times. “Not my fault he’s big like his father,” she grumbled, her small hands splaying over the rounded swell of her belly that was bound to burst within the next month. 

Ben just chuckled a little, walking over to her so that his own warm palms could rest against her stomach and feel the life inside that kicked upon his touch. “He likes you more than me,” Rey whined, looking up at her husband who just grinned back at her and tried to play it off with a shrug, “I was the one who put him there.” Ben pulled away then, starting to head for the village as well as Rey gaped after him and began to follow in earnest.

“Hey! It takes two, you know!” she argued, trekking up the island-side and only stopping when Ben came to a sudden rest at the very top. His back was still facing her, strong and tall and wide, but he turned his face to the side then and she could see the worry in his expression. “Do you think I’ll be a good father?” he barely whispered, his eyes still cast upon the ground as Rey began to climb, slower this time, to approach him and finally stand before him.

Her hands found his face like they had so many years ago when he returned to her as Ben Solo. “Yes,” she stated soft and firm, “you will be. Anyone who sacrifices their life for the person they love will be a good parent, Ben. And if you ever stray, you know I’ll be there to guide you like I always am.” He finally met her gaze, his chocolate eyes beaming down at her as his giant palm covered the hand on the right side of his face. “You know I love you, don’t you?” he hummed, leaning down to press a devoted kiss against her forehead. “I know,” she agreed, tilting her head up just a fraction to capture his lips for the millionth time, though it felt like their first kiss all over again.

**Author's Note:**

> anyway ben isn't dead, i refuse to believe it. that is all.


End file.
